{"id":5046,"date":"2022-06-06T15:34:16","date_gmt":"2022-06-06T13:34:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/?p=5046"},"modified":"2023-05-03T00:15:50","modified_gmt":"2023-05-02T22:15:50","slug":"gurbuz-kiyamet-emeklisi-notlar-3","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/2022\/06\/06\/gurbuz-kiyamet-emeklisi-notlar-3\/","title":{"rendered":"G\u00fcrb\u00fcz, K\u0131yamet Emeklisi | Notlar 3"},"content":{"rendered":"

[183-234]<\/p>\n

Sonbahar geliyor, Baba biraz celalli. Bir g\u00fcl\u00fcp bir tersliyor Aziz’i ve bac\u0131lar\u0131. Kendini k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcltme e\u011fitimi a\u011f\u0131r i\u015flerle devam ediyor. Baba’n\u0131n o zamanki ruh halinden mi yoksa e\u011fitimin bir par\u00e7as\u0131 olan Aziz’i yok sayma ve zorlama niyetinden mi tam belli de\u011fil. Baba ile m\u00fccadele ona bir sinme, sessizlik, kendi i\u00e7ine d\u00f6nme ve s\u00fcrekli \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma hali olarak d\u00f6n\u00fcyor (s. 186). Bo\u015f g\u00fcnlerde bir bo\u015fluk gibi ya\u015f\u0131yor. Sessizli\u011fi Nazif Bey’in geli\u015fi bozuyor. Aziz’e bir kez daha ne yapt\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 sorup onunla gelmesini istiyor, Aziz’deki g\u00f6zlem ve olgunluk birden y\u00fckselmi\u015f: “Aziz eski bildik hayat\u0131ndan uzakla\u015fal\u0131 beri insanlar\u0131n pek g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc bildi\u011fi anlad\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi varl\u0131klar olmad\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 fark ediyordu. Mesela \u015fimdi Nazif Bey’in \u015fu soruyu soran adama asl\u0131nda \u00e7ok benzemedi\u011fini de bir \u015fekil biliyordu. Bu soruyu soran adam olmaktan \u00e7\u0131kt\u0131\u011f\u0131 vakit ba\u015fka bir \u015fey olaca\u011f\u0131n\u0131 ama onun da \u00e7ok \u00e7abuk de\u011fi\u015fece\u011fini sohbetlerde hep g\u00f6r\u00fcyordu. Ki\u015finin ho\u015funa gidecek, onu rahats\u0131z etmeyecek, onu uyand\u0131rmayacak bir kaval, bir d\u00fcd\u00fck sesi olmal\u0131yd\u0131 s\u00f6z. Bu s\u00f6z\u00fcn ne dedi\u011fi duyulmamal\u0131, anla\u015f\u0131lmamal\u0131, na\u011fmesi ki\u015finin kendi kendine kald\u0131\u011f\u0131nda hep \u0131sl\u0131kla \u00e7ald\u0131\u011f\u0131 olmal\u0131yd\u0131” (s. 188).<\/p>\n

Nazif sonunda Baba’yla oturma f\u0131rsat\u0131 elde ediyor. Konuya haz\u0131rlanm\u0131\u015f: “Gelmeden tarikatlar ile ilgili bir \u015feyler okumu\u015f, \u00f6\u011frencili\u011finden kalma Auguste Comte ve Marcuse’den kitaplar\u0131 kar\u0131\u015ft\u0131rm\u0131\u015f, kendini belli bir muhakemenin sahibi k\u0131lmak i\u00e7in son bir haftad\u0131r bu kavanozun i\u00e7inde sallay\u0131p durmu\u015f, d\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 kolay s\u0131yr\u0131lacak bir kabuk gibi de olsa bunlarla kaplam\u0131\u015ft\u0131” (s. 189). Burada bence G\u00fcrb\u00fcz’\u00fcn okumaya, ya da hadi yar\u0131m yamalak okumaya kar\u015f\u0131 tavr\u0131 yine apa\u00e7\u0131k ortada. Saat\u00e7ilik belgeselinde “sade okumu\u015f insanda bir haml\u0131k vard\u0131r” derken oldu\u011fu gibi. Baba Nazif’i ho\u015f kar\u015f\u0131l\u0131yor. Ge\u00e7en g\u00fcnlerde Nazif bir bunal\u0131m\u0131n i\u00e7ine d\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015f, \u00e7\u0131kmaya \u00e7abal\u0131yor. Aynada bile kendine bakamaz hale gelmi\u015f. Kendine inanc\u0131n\u0131 kaybetti\u011finde bir kurtar\u0131c\u0131ya, peygambere, Allah’a s\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131r hale gelmi\u015f. Yine de bir s\u00fcre Baba’y\u0131 dinledikten sonra “bunca s\u00f6z\u00fc sadece dinlemenin onu al\u0131k g\u00f6sterece\u011fine kani olup biraz k\u0131p\u0131rdanmaya ba\u015flad\u0131” (s. 193). Ah Aziz, ah Nazif. A\u00e7\u0131k\u00e7a yard\u0131m istiyor: “kendimle aram\u0131 fena bozdum. Art\u0131k insanlar\u0131n aras\u0131na kat\u0131\u015fmam zor. \u00dcstelik bunu yavanla\u015farak yapt\u0131m, co\u015farak de\u011fil. Aram\u0131zdaki aks de\u011fil mi, aks aleyhime a\u00e7\u0131ld\u0131. En k\u00f6t\u00fc adama kom\u015fu oldum” (s. 194). Biraz sonra Nazif gev\u015femeye ba\u015fl\u0131yor, Baba’ya inan\u00e7l\u0131 olup olmad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 soruyor, Metaxa istiyor. \u00dc\u00e7 \u00e7ay barda\u011f\u0131 geliyor, Nazif’in aceleyle i\u00e7kiyi kafay\u0131 diki\u015fine Baba bana sanki Aziz’in de hayat\u0131na de\u011fiyormu\u015f gibi gelen bir \u015ferh d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcyor: “Acele eden kendine eder derler, \u015fimdi bekleme zaman\u0131, bir de bekletir ki elo\u011flu, bir\u00a0 bekletir ki, yiyece\u011fini de yemez, verece\u011fini de vermez, g\u00f6rd\u00fc ya, i\u015fte bitti. Erken a\u00e7an \u00e7i\u00e7ek, on ya\u015f\u0131nda bulu\u011fa giren k\u0131z, d\u00f6rt ya\u015f\u0131nda okuma \u00f6\u011frenen o\u011flan, erken d\u00f6l alan kad\u0131n, erken yol alan salak adam i\u015fte bunlar\u0131n \u00f6mr\u00fc beklemeyle ge\u00e7er” (s. 196).<\/p>\n

Nazif sohbetten sonu\u00e7 \u00e7\u0131kmad\u0131k\u00e7a sab\u0131rs\u0131zlan\u0131yor: “Acele ile, “Ben,” dedi, “ben kaza m\u0131 kader ile mi do\u011fmu\u015f oldu\u011fumu nas\u0131l \u00f6\u011frenebilirim? Siz mi s\u00f6yleyeceksiniz, nas\u0131l \u00f6\u011frenece\u011fim?” diye yine kontrols\u00fcz bir sesle sordu. \u00c7ok acelesi varm\u0131\u015f, hemen \u00f6\u011frenecek ve \u00f6\u011frendi\u011fi ile bir yere ba\u015fvuracakm\u0131\u015f gibiydi” (s. 198). Metaxa bitiyor, yenisi geliyor, kaza m\u0131 kader mi diye tart\u0131\u015fma s\u00fcr\u00fcyorken Nazif bir h\u0131\u015f\u0131mla \u015fi\u015feyi al\u0131p ayaklan\u0131p \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yor. Bu sefer kendini k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcrmeyi ba\u015fard\u0131.<\/p>\n

Nazif’in hayat\u0131na biraz daha yak\u0131ndan bak\u0131yoruz. Ankara’da okudu\u011fu b\u00f6l\u00fcm Matematik’mi\u015f. Ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131n ona bak\u0131\u015f\u0131n\u0131 fark edince kendine de \u00f6yle onlar\u0131n bakt\u0131\u011f\u0131 gibi bakar olmu\u015f, ama ba\u015fkas\u0131 olmak istemi\u015f, tek ba\u015f\u0131na a\u011flarm\u0131\u015f yurt odas\u0131nda (s. 200). “Kendini hi\u00e7bir \u015fey olmayan ve olamayacak olan g\u00f6r\u00fcyordu, ba\u015fkalar\u0131n\u0131 da ha bire hurcunu dolduran” (s. 201). D\u00fc\u015f\u00fcnceyi masadan kalbine ta\u015f\u0131yamam\u0131\u015f. “Bir-iki \u015fiirini bildi\u011fi \u015faire biri bir \u015fey dese yumrukla\u015f\u0131yor” (s. 202) k\u0131sm\u0131nda millete kantinlerde, yemekhanede Nuri Bilge Ceylan (\u00dc\u00e7 Maymun \u00f6ncesi) savunmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015ft\u0131\u011f\u0131m ac\u0131 g\u00fcnler akl\u0131ma geldi. Nazif’in \u00e7ilesi asl\u0131nda olamayaca\u011f\u0131 birisi olmay\u0131 istemesi, kendiyle bar\u0131\u015famamas\u0131, kendine h\u0131yanete ra\u011fmen uyumlulu\u011fu olmu\u015f gibi. Elinde \u015fi\u015feyle \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p y\u00fcr\u00fcrken bunlar\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyor. Bir son \u00f6z\u00fcr i\u00e7in Aziz’in ailesinin evine gidiyor. Babadan, zaten yapamad\u0131\u011f\u0131 velili\u011fi devralma \u00e7\u0131k\u0131\u015f\u0131ndan dolay\u0131 \u00f6z\u00fcr diliyor, baba \u00f6zr\u00fc kabul ediliyor, Nazif elleri cebinde h\u0131nc\u0131yla y\u00fcr\u00fcmeye devam: “”Hi\u00e7 kimse,” dedi kendi kendine, “hi\u00e7 kimse bir r\u00fctbe almamal\u0131 bu d\u00fcnyada. Ama bu nas\u0131l olacak? Babaym\u0131\u015f, \u015feyhmi\u015f, hadi ordan, postu ay\u0131dan kapan \u015feyh oluyor, hadi ordan,” diye ba\u011f\u0131rd\u0131” (s. 205). \u0130kinci b\u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn sonu.<\/p>\n

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Nazif’in geli\u015finden sonra bir ay falan ge\u00e7mi\u015f, evde yine meydan uyand\u0131r\u0131lacak. “\u0130\u015fiten bir canl\u0131ya d\u00f6n\u00fc\u015fm\u00fc\u015ft\u00fc” Aziz (s. 208). Duyumu iyice ilerlemi\u015f. Baba t\u0131pk\u0131 Aziz’e sordu\u011fu gibi meydanda di\u011fer insanlara da kendilerini nas\u0131l g\u00f6rd\u00fcklerini soruyor, tatmin etmeyen cevaplar alsa kendine y\u00f6nelen bak\u0131\u015fa dair tavsiyeler veriyor cemaate. En son Baba’n\u0131n bak\u0131\u015f\u0131yla belki ‘kendini bilmez’ diyebilece\u011fimiz bir adam\u0131n konu\u015fmas\u0131 \u00fczerine Baba sanki bir sinir bozuklu\u011fuyla g\u00fclmeye ba\u015flay\u0131p evi bo\u015faltt\u0131r\u0131yor. K\u0131sac\u0131k \u00fc\u00e7\u00fcnc\u00fc b\u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fcn sonu (s. 212).<\/p>\n

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Yaz geldi, iki y\u0131l ge\u00e7mi\u015f Baba’n\u0131n evinde. E\u011fitime devam: “\u0130nsan bakacak bir \u015fey arad\u0131\u011f\u0131nda onlar\u0131 g\u00f6rmek yine de iyidir. Ama i\u015fte ama var. Sen, her \u015fey bitti\u011finde, her \u015fey elendi\u011finde kalacak olan olmal\u0131s\u0131n … Bu zihnen olacak. \u0130nsan zihindir. Koca bir zihin. \u0130drakle olacaks\u0131n, idrak edeceksin demiyorum, idrak olacaks\u0131n, idrake dahil, onun i\u00e7inden olacaks\u0131n. \u0130nsan idrak olabilirse bir \u015fey olman\u0131n k\u0131y\u0131s\u0131nda durabilir. \u0130nsan kaderinden daha g\u00fc\u00e7l\u00fcd\u00fcr” (s. 214). Aziz bac\u0131lar\u0131n yollar\u0131n\u0131n nas\u0131l buraya vard\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 d\u00fc\u015f\u00fcn\u00fcyor, onlar\u0131n nas\u0131l \u00e7ekildi\u011fini. Kendisi onlara ac\u0131yor, destek olmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131rken sanki onlar yard\u0131ma ihtiya\u00e7lar\u0131 oldu\u011fundan de\u011fil, yard\u0131mc\u0131yla payla\u015f\u0131m yapmak i\u00e7in yard\u0131ma izin veridklerini anl\u0131yorum. \u00d6\u011fretinin Jakob von Gunten ya da herhangi bir itaatte huzur arama k\u0131sm\u0131 da burada akl\u0131ma geldi: “Ne vakit Aziz bir i\u015fi onlar\u0131n yerine ele alsa onlar\u0131n bir ba\u015fkas\u0131na yap\u0131\u015ft\u0131klar\u0131n\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcyordu. Yorgunluk ve \u015fik\u00e2yetsizlik, hizmette olma ve kendini unutma u\u011fruda buradayd\u0131lar zaten” (s. 216). Aziz ne kadar sorsa da bac\u0131lar\u0131n ge\u00e7mi\u015fine dair bir \u015fey \u00f6\u011frenemiyor.<\/p>\n

Aziz’i kendini \u00f6\u011fretiye b\u0131rakamamas\u0131 \u00fczerine Baba: “O\u011flum korktu\u011fun ne, neden kendini bu gayrete tam olarak b\u0131rakm\u0131yorsun, \u00e7ok seyrek baz\u0131 hallerin \u00fcst \u00fcste baz\u0131 g\u00fcnlerin oluyor ama do\u011frulup hemen gene kendine, gene benli\u011fine tutunup yap\u0131\u015f\u0131yorsun …” (s. 217). Burada Aziz’in i\u00e7inde birbiriyle \u00e7arp\u0131\u015fan benler ortaya \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yor. Aziz bir t\u00fcrl\u00fc o istenen benim ortaya \u00e7\u0131k\u0131p di\u011ferlerini bast\u0131ramad\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 s\u00f6yl\u00fcyor. Baba’n\u0131n kendini izlemekle gereksiz detaylara tak\u0131lma fark\u0131 \u00fczerine s\u00f6zleri: “\u00d6ncelikle kendini izleme ile kendine a\u015f\u0131r\u0131 derecede yak\u0131ndan bakmay\u0131 ay\u0131r birbirinden. Sen izleyeceksin, ba\u015fkas\u0131n\u0131 izler gibi. Yoksa maazallah insan kendine \u00e7ok yak\u0131ndan bakmaya ba\u015flarsa kendini hasm\u0131ndan ay\u0131ramaz ve kendine d\u00fc\u015fman olur. Yani kendi etraf\u0131nda menfa m\u00fcfetti\u015fi gibi dola\u015fma. Teferruat putperestliktir Azizim …” (s. 218). Sonras\u0131nda da benle \u00f6tekinin bir olu\u015fu \u00fczerine vahdet-i v\u00fcc\u00fbd’u hat\u0131rlatan c\u00fcmleler s\u00f6yl\u00fcyor.<\/p>\n

Aziz’in d\u00f6rt ki\u015fili\u011fi oldu\u011funu s\u00f6yl\u00fcyor Baba. Bunlar\u0131n i\u00e7inden nas\u0131l o arada \u00e7\u0131kan sesi daha uzun s\u00fcre duyabilece\u011fini arayacaklar. Bu “onun be\u015f dakikas\u0131n\u0131 yar\u0131m saate \u00e7\u0131karmaya bak, rahattan biraz rahats\u0131z olmaya bak” (s. 219) k\u0131sm\u0131 utan\u00e7 verici bir bi\u00e7imde ki\u015fisel geli\u015fim ya da sa\u011fl\u0131kl\u0131 ya\u015fam \u00f6\u011f\u00fctlerini akl\u0131ma getirdi. Ama bir yandan da her \u015feyin ba\u015f\u0131 pratik, konular farkl\u0131 olsa da y\u00f6ntem benzer olabiliyor.<\/p>\n

\u0130ki ta\u015f\u0131 iple ba\u011flay\u0131p, tam kulaklar\u0131n\u0131 kapatacak \u015fekilde Aziz’in kafas\u0131na as\u0131yor Baba. Be\u015f ay bu ta\u015flarla ya\u015f\u0131yor Aziz. Bu haliyle, ge\u00e7mi\u015fte Baba’ya s\u00f6z verdi\u011fi \u00fczere Hasan Efendi’nin ay\u0131s\u0131n\u0131n burnundan halkas\u0131n\u0131 \u00e7\u0131karmaya gidiyor (s. 221).\u00a0 Hasan Efendi’nin deste\u011fiyle kopar\u0131p \u00e7\u0131kar\u0131yor halkay\u0131, sonra Baba bunu gerdan\u0131na kolye olarak takt\u0131r\u0131yor. Gurur duyuyor Baba Aziz’in bu eyleminden. Kulaklar\u0131n\u0131 kapatan ta\u015flar Aziz’de -babas\u0131ndan da hat\u0131rlad\u0131\u011f\u0131m\u0131z- bir s\u00fck\u00fbneti \u00e7a\u011f\u0131r\u0131yor (s. 226). Aziz ki\u015filik incelemelerini ba\u015fka insanlara da y\u00f6neltiyor, birka\u00e7 saatte birka\u00e7 y\u00fcz\u00fcn\u00fc tan\u0131maya ba\u015fl\u0131yor insanlar\u0131n (s. 228).<\/p>\n

Baba da yava\u015ftan Aziz’in kendini g\u00f6zlemini kategorile\u015ftirmeye ba\u015fl\u0131yor, ki\u015filiklerini tan\u0131ml\u0131yor: Bal\u0131k\u00e7\u0131, Mayac\u0131, Kepenekli (Kemal). Bu y\u00fczler aras\u0131nda en \u00e7ok Kemal \u00f6ne \u00e7\u0131k\u0131yor, “onu yukar\u0131ya \u00e7ekiyordu” (s. 232). Kemal etraf\u0131n\u0131 be\u011fenmiyor, biraz da Baba’ya benziyor ama daha yumu\u015fak huylu. Aziz, Baba’n\u0131n bir \u015feyleri hemen anlaman\u0131n manas\u0131zl\u0131\u011f\u0131na dair konu\u015fmalar\u0131n\u0131 hat\u0131rl\u0131yor. Aziz kulaklar\u0131n\u0131 kapas\u0131n m\u0131 d\u0131\u015far\u0131ya a\u00e7s\u0131n m\u0131, konu\u015fsun mu sussun mu bilemiyor. Baba’n\u0131n Aziz’i biraz yoksayan ve hayal k\u0131r\u0131kl\u0131\u011f\u0131 uyand\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131 haberini veren tirad\u0131: “Sen de hakl\u0131s\u0131n Aziz can ne yand\u0131n ki so\u011fuyas\u0131n ya da ne vakit Yakup’tun ki? Ne dine bir g\u00f6k k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcmsemesi ile bakt\u0131 da yere yap\u0131\u015ft\u0131n, de\u011fil mi? Bana sen gelmedin ki, kap\u0131ya kedi gelmi\u015f ben onu aslan yapmaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015f\u0131yorum, Allah belam\u0131 versin, daha da versin, verdi\u011fi kadar\u0131 da yetmiyor g\u00f6rd\u00fc\u011f\u00fc gibi, daha ne kadar varsa g\u00f6ndersin, az geliyor, bana \u015fifa olacak kadar b\u00fcy\u00fck bir bela istiyorum, ister yok ederek ister etrafa bakmama art\u0131k mani olacak b\u00fcy\u00fckl\u00fckte bir bela istiyorum. Rabbim ben hakk\u0131yla, t\u00fcm g\u00fcc\u00fcmle kahret, her kahr zerresini yudum yudum i\u00e7mek istiyorum. Ne felaket asl\u0131nda herkesin ba\u015f\u0131na gelen dert ve belalarla ya\u015famak de\u011fil mi, bana reva g\u00f6r\u00fclene bak. Ne kadar az’\u0131m ki kar\u0131ncan\u0131n yuvas\u0131na biraz sonra yeme\u011fe koyaca\u011f\u0131 tuzdan serpen kad\u0131n gibi arkas\u0131n\u0131 d\u00f6n\u00fcp gidiyor. Sana bu kadar\u0131 k\u00e2fi diyor. Lut mu olmak laz\u0131m yahu, s\u0131rf \u00fcbenaya m\u0131 yer yar\u0131l\u0131yor, yani rabbim \u00fc\u00e7 tane \u00fcbenaya k\u0131zd\u0131\u011f\u0131 kadar bana k\u0131zam\u0131yor mu can\u0131m, hani da\u011f\u0131n yar\u0131l\u0131p \u00fcst\u00fcme gelmesi, hani suyun \u00e7ekilmesi, vah ba\u015f\u0131ma gelen belan\u0131n azl\u0131\u011f\u0131na. Beni terbiye ya da helak etmeyen belan\u0131n Allah belas\u0131n\u0131 versin”.” (s. 234, b\u00f6l\u00fcm sonu)<\/p>\n

\u015eule G\u00fcrb\u00fcz,\u00a0K\u0131yamet Emeklisi \u2013 Birinci Cilt<\/em>, \u0130leti\u015fim Yay\u0131nlar\u0131, 2022.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

[183-234] Sonbahar geliyor, Baba biraz celalli. Bir g\u00fcl\u00fcp bir tersliyor Aziz’i ve bac\u0131lar\u0131. Kendini k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fcltme e\u011fitimi a\u011f\u0131r i\u015flerle devam ediyor. Baba’n\u0131n o zamanki ruh halinden mi yoksa e\u011fitimin bir par\u00e7as\u0131 olan Aziz’i yok sayma ve zorlama niyetinden mi tam belli de\u011fil. Baba ile m\u00fccadele ona bir sinme, sessizlik, kendi i\u00e7ine d\u00f6nme ve s\u00fcrekli \u00e7al\u0131\u015fma hali … Continue reading G\u00fcrb\u00fcz, K\u0131yamet Emeklisi | Notlar 3<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5046","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-genel"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p9WYIs-1jo","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4934,"url":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/2022\/05\/23\/gurbuz-kiyamet-emeklisi-notlar-ii\/","url_meta":{"origin":5046,"position":0},"title":"G\u00fcrb\u00fcz, K\u0131yamet Emeklisi | Notlar 2","author":"yalpertem","date":"23 May 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"[113-182] Son notu Baba'n\u0131n \"S\u00f6yleyin bakal\u0131m, ya\u015fayan m\u0131 b\u00fcy\u00fckt\u00fcr \u00f6l\u00fc m\u00fc?\" (s. 113) sorusuyla b\u0131rakm\u0131\u015f\u0131m. Aziz, ya\u015fayan b\u00fcy\u00fckt\u00fcr diyor. Baba \u00f6lenlerin ya\u015fam\u0131n\u0131n ba\u015fkalar\u0131nda ve i\u015flerinde s\u00fcrd\u00fc\u011f\u00fcnden ve ya\u015fam\u0131n k\u0131ymetinden s\u00f6z ediyor. Aziz \"Baba'y\u0131 dinlerken zihninde uyu\u015fmaya benzer bir his duyuyor\" (s. 114) ya da \"kendini bilmeden bir b\u00fcy\u00fcn\u00fcn i\u00e7ine s\u00fcr\u00fclm\u00fc\u015f\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "genel"","block_context":{"text":"genel","link":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/category\/genel\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":4924,"url":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/2022\/05\/22\/gurbuz-kiyamet-emeklisi-notlar-i\/","url_meta":{"origin":5046,"position":1},"title":"G\u00fcrb\u00fcz, K\u0131yamet Emeklisi | Notlar 1","author":"yalpertem","date":"22 May 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"\u0130ki ciltlik, 1000 sayfaya yak\u0131nsayan K\u0131yamet Emeklisi'ni okurken okudu\u011fum yerleri unutmamak i\u00e7in ara ara notlar almaya \u00e7al\u0131\u015faca\u011f\u0131m. Belki tad\u0131na daha da \u00e7ok var\u0131r\u0131m b\u00f6ylece. Hevesim baki kal\u0131r, intihalden de mail almazsam umar\u0131m devam edebilirim. Sayfa numaras\u0131 yazd\u0131\u011f\u0131m al\u0131nt\u0131lar\u0131n hepsi \u015furadan: \u015eule G\u00fcrb\u00fcz, K\u0131yamet Emeklisi - Birinci Cilt, \u0130leti\u015fim Yay\u0131nlar\u0131, 2022.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "al\u0131nt\u0131"","block_context":{"text":"al\u0131nt\u0131","link":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/category\/alinti\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":6161,"url":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/2023\/05\/08\/hisar-ayakkabilar-anlatici-ali-nizami-beyin-alafrangaligi-ve-seyhligi\/","url_meta":{"origin":5046,"position":2},"title":"Hisar, ayakkab\u0131lar, anlat\u0131c\u0131 | Ali Nizam\u00ee Bey’in Alafrangal\u0131\u011f\u0131 ve \u015eeyhli\u011fi","author":"yalpertem","date":"8 May 2023","format":false,"excerpt":"Romanda anlat\u0131c\u0131n\u0131n ilk sars\u0131l\u0131\u015f\u0131, ge\u00e7mi\u015fteki fark\u0131na var\u0131\u015f\u0131 hat\u0131rlay\u0131\u015f\u0131. Zabel Yesayan'\u0131n Son Kadeh'inden bir pasaj\u0131 hat\u0131rlatt\u0131 bana, benzer duygular hissettim bu b\u00f6l\u00fcm\u00fc okurken. Belki roman\u0131n i\u00e7inde denemenin kendine yer a\u00e7t\u0131\u011f\u0131n\u0131 fark etti\u011fim ilk an oldu\u011fu i\u00e7indir. Sonunda y\u00fcr\u00fcy\u00fc\u015fe ba\u011flamas\u0131 da m\u00fcthi\u015f. \" Fakat hat\u0131rl\u0131yorum ki bu manzaraya en \u00e7ok g\u00fclen ben\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "al\u0131nt\u0131"","block_context":{"text":"al\u0131nt\u0131","link":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/category\/alinti\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/05\/ali-nizami-bey-220x300.jpeg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":5072,"url":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/2022\/07\/03\/gurbuz-kiyamet-emeklisi-notlar-4\/","url_meta":{"origin":5046,"position":3},"title":"G\u00fcrb\u00fcz, K\u0131yamet Emeklisi | Notlar 4","author":"yalpertem","date":"3 July 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"[235-] Aziz'in kula\u011f\u0131ndaki ta\u015flar \u00e7\u0131kart\u0131lm\u0131\u015f, Kas\u0131m gelmi\u015f, 70'lerin sonlar\u0131nda olsak gerek. Baba'dan \"vakar\"l\u0131 g\u00f6r\u00fcnme \u00fcst\u00fcne bir \u00f6vg\u00fc al\u0131yor, vakar\u0131 olmasa da varm\u0131\u015f gibi yapmak iyidir diyor Baba (s. 236). Vakar'\u0131n ilk \u00e7a\u011f\u0131rd\u0131\u011f\u0131 Ishiguro'nun G\u00fcnden Kalanlar'\u0131. \u00c7ok \u00e7ok uzaklardan da olsa, o roman Aziz'e hayat\u0131n nas\u0131l ya\u015fanabilece\u011fine dair olumsuz bir \u00f6neri\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "genel"","block_context":{"text":"genel","link":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/category\/genel\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":5519,"url":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/2022\/11\/08\/eksen-hapishane-ziyareti\/","url_meta":{"origin":5046,"position":4},"title":"Eksen, hapishane ziyareti","author":"yalpertem","date":"8 November 2022","format":false,"excerpt":"Kerem Eksen'in \u00d6l\u00fcmden Uzak Bir Yer roman\u0131n\u0131 okuduk kitap kul\u00fcb\u00fcm\u00fczde. Ben ka\u00e7\u0131rm\u0131\u015f\u0131m ilk iki roman\u0131n\u0131, onlar da ilgimi \u00e7ekti bak\u0131nca, entelekt\u00fcel romanlar\u0131. Bu roman ba\u015flarda en s\u0131radan ve g\u00fcndelik haliyle \u00e7ift ve aile ya\u015fant\u0131s\u0131na k\u00fc\u00e7\u00fck ironilerle bak\u0131\u015f\u0131yla beni heyecanland\u0131rm\u0131\u015ft\u0131 ama ilerledik\u00e7e olup bitenlere daha az merak duymaya ba\u015flad\u0131m. Merkezine ald\u0131\u011f\u0131\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "al\u0131nt\u0131"","block_context":{"text":"al\u0131nt\u0131","link":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/category\/alinti\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/11\/kerem-eksen-olumden-uzak-bir-yer-193x300.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":1709,"url":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/2018\/06\/10\/lefebvre-yabancilasma-uzerine\/","url_meta":{"origin":5046,"position":5},"title":"Lefebvre, Yabanc\u0131la\u015fma \u00dczerine","author":"yalpertem","date":"10 June 2018","format":false,"excerpt":"\" Yabanc\u0131la\u015fma kavram\u0131, otuz y\u0131l kadar \u00f6nce yeniden ele al\u0131nd\u0131\u011f\u0131ndan beri defalarca incelenmi\u015ftir. Bu incelemenin derinle\u015ftirilmi\u015f bir tarihini elbette yazmak gerekir. Bu tarih, \"Felsefenin miras\u0131 ve belki de temel malvarl\u0131\u011f\u0131 olan yabanc\u0131la\u015fma mefhumu, modern d\u00fcnyan\u0131n bilinmesinde analiz ayg\u0131t\u0131 olarak nas\u0131l hizmet edebilir? Felsefeden toplumsal bilimlere nas\u0131l ge\u00e7er?\" teorik sorununu \u00e7\u00f6zmeyi\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "al\u0131nt\u0131"","block_context":{"text":"al\u0131nt\u0131","link":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/category\/alinti\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2018\/06\/henri-lefebvre-g%C3%BCndelik-hayat%C4%B1n-ele%C5%9Ftirisi-II-210x300.png?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5046","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5046"}],"version-history":[{"count":15,"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5046\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":6139,"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5046\/revisions\/6139"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5046"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5046"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yalpertem.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5046"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}